YOU may have heard that there are several types of orgasm – the clitoral, vaginal and blended. Sexologists have submitted that an orgasm is an orgasm, irrespective of what part of the woman’s body or genitals is being stimulated. I am inclined to go along with them. There is, however, the need not to relegate the clitoral, vaginal and blended (the combination of the aforementioned two) orgasms to be background, as, these two areas of a woman's genital that can lead to the most satisfying female orgasm.

Therefore in seeking to make your woman come, you might want to keep in mind that any type of sexual stimulation would almost always make her come, however, women sampled in the course of this publication claimed that reaching orgasm for them is much more difficult through penile penetration than it is through clitoris stimulation. Therefore, the most preferred tool for clitoral orgasm would be the fingers, they said. But hey, ask your own woman first before you go on this route as other women equally spoken to do not feel comfortable with clitoral stimulation.

A little pointer from ASKMEN added that “massage, foreplay, direct stimulation, and even talking can make a woman reach orgasm. Most women, however, find that direct stimulation of the clitoris is the easiest way for them to climax. So use your tongue, your fingers, even rub your penis against it, and she might climax.”
An ancient Chinese proverb says “Man is fire, woman is water. The man's fire brings the woman's water to boiling.” This could never be truer if you understand that with women, love making is a process. There is a marked difference between you and your woman. While you are immediately stimulated by sight, she is not. She needs a little more than that. She needs romance, a feeling that she is an attractive woman and not just some service provider. In other words, have a relationship with her. Have you ever wondered why someone “snatched” your woman? One of the tools they used was that they listened to her, made her feel special and were there for her. They basically made the woman desire them enough to want to have sex with them and they did this by having a relationship with her.

A marriage counselor, and psychologist, Dr Kemi Fasaanu, said in making your woman orgasm, you’ll have to understand that love making is a slow and affectionate process which may likely start several hours before the actual sex act. So, start the day by showering her with fondness and attention. And when it comes the act, do not rush her as women, she said, need a much longer foreplay than men. Start by whispering sweet words in her ear and fondling her all over, excluding the genital area (some men erroneously believe that attacking the woman’s genital area will grant a quicker access to orgasm). Be sensitive, all the time, to what she likes and what she wants to hear.

According to the authors of ‘Bringing Women to a Climax’, Dr David Delvin, a family planning specialist and Christine Webber, psychotherapist, the most important thing a man has to realise about female climaxes is that with women, it's not a mechanical thing – as it generally is with men.

“You see, most males will ejaculate quite quickly if they have their penises rubbed,” they said, adding that: “This applies even if the circumstances aren't very romantic – or even if they don't particularly like the person who's doing the rubbing! Women are not like this. Female orgasm isn't a push-button response. The conditions have to be right.”

They concluded that although females vary, many women need the following if they're going to reach a climax easily: “a romantic atmosphere, pleasant, comfortable surroundings, a partner who they really like, a feeling of being wanted and appreciated, a good flow of natural lubrication - so that the delicate female parts don't get sore, a skilled partner who knows how to stimulate the clitoris. Unless you can provide the above, you are not going to have great success in giving your partner orgasms.”

A skilled partner is one who knows that “most women are controlled by their emotions, and by their minds. When you want to have sex with her, what do you do? Not grope her all over, but turn her on, starting in her MIND! You bring her roses, wine and dine her, tell her how beautiful she looks, until she’s overcome with desire, and must have you,” according to Vin DiCarlo, author ‘Pandora's Box’

He does not only bring her “stuffs” or feed her; he finds a way to give her all pleasure before he receives. One way to do this: have your partner lie on her back in the missionary sex position. If you wish, her raise her legs a little for deeper penetration, but it’s not as if it is entirely necessary, to perform this move. As you thrust in and out of her, place your hand on her lower stomach, just above the bone of the pelvis and press down gently.

The trick with this kind of move (known as stimulating the G-stop) is that your partner will experience the feeling of wanting to urinate. Therefore, it is advisable that you have her use the bathroom beforehand. The sensation of having to urinate when you’re stimulating the g-spot is actually her body filling itself with female ejaculation.

The rationale behind this kind of technique is that it presses the g-spot lower towards your penis, allowing it to rub up against the g-spot more firmly. Because of the angle of the g-spot (which is located on the top wall of the vagina, about two to three inches in), it can be quite difficult to get your penis to rub up against it during sex. Now, by pressing your hand down on her lower stomach, you are pushing the g-spot closer to your penis and this will allow you to stimulate her with your penis, allowing you and your partner to possibly reach simultaneous orgasm together.

Please bear in mind that – contrary to what many men think – sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman's clitoris. Nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth, according to Delvin and Webber. 
Therefore, “try not to give the impression to your female partner that she ‘ought’ to be able to climax through intercourse alone and that that is what you think of as ‘proper sex’. The sex menu can be a varied one. Some women, for example, find it really easy to climax through oral sex – particularly if the guy is patient and sensitive to what his partner wants. And how does he find out what she wants and what turns her on? Well, a wise man will ask her”, they added.

Also, a skilled partner will understand or bear in mind that he ought not to assume that his technique is flawless and that if his partner does not come, it’s her fault. A lot of men naively think that because a previous woman in his life came or achieved orgasm in a certain way; his current woman has to too. I will like to throw it in here that women aren’t all the same in their likes and dislikes, same as everyone out there. Therefore, do not make your partner feel guilty for your own mistakes. Treat her as an individual instead.

These useful tips, as put together by Delvin and Webber, might be help worth putting into consideration whenever it was time to make love to your woman:
• don't be in a rush.
• don't be too demanding – it's not an Olympic event.
• talk to your partner, and ask her what she wants you to do to her.
• always create a romantic atmosphere.
• make sure that everything is comfortable and nice for her.
• give her lots of kisses and cuddles before you even think about making any approach to her sexual area.
• when you do start to stroke, rub or kiss her genitals, don't rush into 'attacking' her clitoris. Take things gently, and see what she wants.
• use her own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris. (If she is over 40, it may be a good idea to use some additional lubrication from a chemist or a sex shop).
• remember that stimulation of the clitoris is the key to female orgasm.
• sometimes encourage her to 'run' your sex sessions. You can learn a lot by watching how she stimulates herself or by really listening to her when she suggests a sex position, or a particular caress.

— Additional help from askmen.com

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