Dear Yemisi,I am a regular reader of your column in the papers. I am really happy about the way you help people in their
relationships.

I am 24 and I have been finding it hard to get over an ex for years now. Each time I am in a new relationship and my date hurts me, I keep remembering my ex-boyfriend. The thing now is that I am so scared and I do not want to miss it maritally. I keep having feelings for him.
Please, help me. I don’t know what to do. - Temmy.

Dear Temmy,
You need a total break from your ex and never at any time compare him to whoever comes your way.

You have to come to terms with the fact that it was a phase you needed to help you prepare for a brighter future.

The problem you are having has to do with the strong bond you had with him that never was reciprocated.

Your having to remember the moments you had together cannot but resurface as long as you are a human being.

Temi, do not be decieved, there is no perfect human being and there cannot but be brushes here and there, but the crucial thing to do is to leave room for individual differences, But if you are reconsidering making it up each other if he is not seriously committed to another lady, please, make amends and give each other another chance. And if your coming back would rock the boat of his new found love please let him be. Learn to accomadate other people’s excesses.

Life is about giving and taking. You need extra grace for you to forget the memories of your former boyfriend.

Concerned efforts must be made by you to accept any lover who approaches you for a date.

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