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Saturday, 04 August 2012
Dear Yemisi,
I am confused. I am a 14-year-old girl, dating a guy aged 29. He deflowered me this year. I love him so much that I want him to marry me.
But the problem now is that he says he wants to marry an Igbo lady. Each time I want to quit, I always think of how he disvirgined me.
He is in the university and I am still in JSS3.
Please, I need your help.
God bless you.
Faith.
Dear Faith,
You are far from being serious with your life and future. What gives you the impression or the courage that this man would wait for you.
As a JSS 3 student and even at 14, what can you point at as your achievement? You’ve obviously sold yourself too cheap. Stop living in a fool’s paradise, there is nothing for you in that unholy romance. The era of just picking on any visionless man is over.
Nowadays, matrimony is a joint venture, the era of the man doing it alone is over. What is going to be your contribution to the home even if the two of you belong to the same age bracket and ethnic group?
Faith, you are not in love, but in lust.
And now that he has told you where his heart is, what then is your decision?I will advise you to stop this nonsense and think of how you will better your lot and not be a parasite.
Or what has the society got for a JSS 3 graduate? You are not better than an unschooled village girl.
Faith, you must decide to live a new life and stop messing up around with men. As long as you present that you are ever ready, you keep getting ready for available opportunists.
The guy cannot afford to wait for you considering his age and taste. He has gotten the better part of you. Did he ever force you to have sex with you?
Please, call it a day with him and stop thinking about the day he devalued you. Your thoughts cannot change anything.
Change your thoughts towards being a better girl who has a bright future and don’t give in to any form of confusion. Nothing from what you have suggested is confusing except you are being economical with the truth.
Faith, the time to act is now and turn a new leaf. Help yourself, please.
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