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Saturday, 23 June 2012
Dear Yemisi,
I am confused. I don’t know what to do or say.
My ex-friend’s friend is asking me out. I think I am in love with him, but I am confused.
Should I accept him?
Please, I need your help. What should I do? Should I say yes or no?
Please, tell me what to do.
BJ.
Dear BJ,
You have to tread softly so as not to make a mistake that you’ll continue to regret for the rest of your life.
You have the right to work on your mind and heart by yourself. Nobody can query your not consenting to his advances because I don’t see him being different from his friend. Afterall, he was in the know while your affair with his friend lasted and probably knew what led to the break up.
Do you think he will be a better love? Won’t he do the same thing his friend did? Haven’t you felt that your former boyfriend would see his friend as a betrayer of trust? This apart, you have not got to your port of landing please.
None of these men, would give you the satisfaction and love that you are craving and yearning for, now or later. You cannot afford to give in to confusion at this stage because it is too early in the day for such a thing.
To be sincere with you, your ex’s friend is not in love, but in lust with you. If you are not discerning enough, before you know it, you would have become a pawn that is being tossed here and there.
You’ll become a laughing stock in their hands and in case this relationship also fails, he will be in a position to recommend you to another friend to have his turn.
Candidly speaking, there is no harm in saying no to his overtures if you want to live in peace now and in the future. Look outside of their group for a better choice.
Do not be too desperate in making a choice as this might be counter-productive. Be vigilant, learn to define your goals, likes and dislikes. Never allow confusion to set in, in any of your affairs.
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