Yet another Val’s day gone!

By Lanre Oyetade

IT was yet another Valentine’s Day two week ago and I thought it necessary to address some issues that form a joint between love and money, and give consideration to the serious issues discussed hereunder even while not intending to spoil the euphoria of loving. I had actually sent this material in severally but it was not published for no one’s fault but I believe we still do need to see it.

Well, the first and obvious issue that occurred to my mind was the issue of making financial provisions for those you love. But it is obvious that, in order to adequately provide for our loved dependants, we must have first made adequate provision for ourselves for no blind man can lead another blind.

Earning a honest living as a youth
So the first issue I will address is the need that one earns an honest living in his youth. And the routes to doing this, even though may be varied, are pretty much predictable. It is true that love is indeed a good feeling and loving in one’s youth is a delightsome experience. However, it is equally true that the period of one’s youth is the period to prepare for the greater challenges of one’s life; a period to garner the ‘arsenals’ with which to prosecute life’s inevitable ‘battles’ and struggles.

So while there is nothing wrong in one having his or her head in the clouds of love, it is pertinent that the important things should not be left out, particularly concerning acquiring the necessary education and skill needed to earn an ample living to sustain the love in the near future. And love does need to be sustained and fuelled with, among other things, ample finance.

This reminds me of one song of the old school regime that says, ‘No romance without finance’. While it may really not be as bad as that, the song underscores a major truth. The fact remains that most divorces, especially in our part of the world, are engendered by factors that can be traced to money problems. So while you have your head in the sky with love matters, do give ample considerations to matters concerning empowering yourself towards earning an honest living in the future - your heartthrob will only love you the more for it.

Taking care of your ‘love products’
Let’s suppose you finally take your heartthrob to the altar, then kids soon follow and the responsibility of parenthood also quickly follows. It has been estimated that it would cost over N26 million to nurture an infant to independence, including cost of food, education, clothing, medication and all. Now, if due consideration is not given this, then the children – products of your love – would not be well taken care of and the dream of giving one’s children much more than our parents were able to give would not materialise.

And then, there’s the issue of leaving something behind for your posterity. The Good Book says a good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children. And talking about leaving an inheritance to our children, one should seriously consider the issue of writing a will once he is 40 and has received providence’s blessing of any considerable quantity.

This is not about being pessimistic or expecting to die, rather it is about facing reality (since we are bound to die anyway, even though prayerfully at a ripe old age) and to ensure that your estate (what you leave behind when you pass on) is adequately taken care of and distributed in accordance with your wishes. Believe me, it actually forms part of taking care of your loved ones who you will ultimately leave behind.

Most of my lawyer-friends tell me that their clients would shy away from this subject whenever it is mentioned but the consensus among the enlightened is that you should indeed write a will as soon as God starts blessing you in substantial material terms. Remember, all things being equal, writing a will would not make you die any earlier than you should.

Hope you had a splendid valentine and did not forget to spread the love to the poor, the neglected and the unloved in your immediate environment. And in the event that you did forget, it’s still not too late to make it up.

Cheers!
Gifts promised people who sent in responses to our questions have already been despatched. This applies only to those people who included their appropriate postal addresses. For those that sent in answers but did not include their postal addresses, please do this now so we can send your gifts to you.

And about the inauguration of Club Inspirati, it is still billed to come up in April in Lagos and each intending member is expected to be at the occasion where all membership arrangements will be concluded.