‘Marketing is not prostitution’

Abimbola Akin-deko Chief (Mrs) Modupeola Abimbola Akin-deko, a former Deputy General Manager of the defunct Cooperative Bank Plc and now Managing Director and Chief Executive Officer of Finesse, management consulting outfit in this interview with YEMISI AOFOLAJU shared her childhood dream, banking experience and how she combined her marriage with professional career. Excerpt:

You rose to become a deputy General Manager at the defunct Cooperative Bank, why did you quit?
I decided to quit after I had put in 26 years.

What was your experience during the 26 years in an environment dominated by men?
I thank God for everything because I believe that He was always there for me. I graduated from the then University of Ife now Obafemi Awolowo University in 1979 with a Bachelor of Science degree in Economics after which I went for the NYSC and it was immediately after the service that I started work with Coop Bank.

I keep on saying one thing, the Grace of God followed by hardwork because He keeps saying that God has given everybody the talent and knowledge that you require to make it. I became a manager in 1987 after having worked for a couple of years and having got married to my sweetheart, hearthrob whom I met at the age of 16. We courted for seven years.

But there was still chance for you to have risen above the post you retired from?
You know God has a purpose and plan for everybody. I believe it was time for me to live when I left.

I believe you have female children, will you encourage any of them into target -driven banking system that operates now?
Let me tell you that all my years at the banking hall took me to various departments. I was once an inspector, I was once head of the marketing department. I was the AGM in charge of marketing. But I believe that marketing is not about prostitution. It is about brains. Yes, there is a target but not unrealistic target. In those days, we set targets and we made sure that we played the game by the rules and I can say to the glory of God that the deposit base of the bank rose appreciably in a couple of months. And we did this by working hand -in -hand with our teams that were made of a male and a female. Banking is a business of decorum; marketing is all about business skills. That was what we have left behind. I will encourage my daughters

If God says it is through banking that they are going to be fulfilled I will support them. I remember that my parents never chose anything for me, but instead they only encouraged me. I can only encourage them, counsel them and tell them to always remember the daughters of whom they are. I was AGM , Marketing and I can raise up my head high anywhere I go in Nigeria and even abroad.

What were your dreams as a young girl?
It is funny. But I must confess to you that all I wanted to be was an air hostess because I was taken in by the elegance, looks and the natural air of civility. As a young girl, such a thing was an attraction but as I grew older, I knew that I could not be because I wouldn’t like hopping from one job to the other. I love staying on a job over the years.

When did you marry your hearthrob?
I got married at 23. And after I was married with children I decided to go back to the University of Ibadan because I believe that knowledge is a continuous process and power ; if you want to compete favourably in a male dominated world, you need to have the right attitude and knowledge to meet with the men. I believe women are the mothers of the nation. I see us as the pride of a nation. She is the glory of creation. I don’t believe in competing; I believe in letting your work speak for you. You cannot earn the respect of these men when you go out of your way to do more than what they have done without struggling with them. But do you know one thing? God has endowed you with all the resources you need and I also believe that you have to work the extra mile. Having had to go back to the university for Master’s degree in Banking and Finance to make sure that I was fit in the system that I was. There and then people began to acknowledge the few things I did. Because I was the first female to head the Training School of the Cooperative Bank in the history of banking industry. What I did there was much of human capacity building. I thank God for Cooperative Bank because they do a lot in training men. Even as the head of trainers, I also developed myself. I gave myself into the work and God started to make things happen at the various departments where I served. To head the training school even not as a trained teacher not knowing that it was God who has a purpose for my life. I thank God for that opportunity. I worked in every segment of banking. It wasn’t easy but for God on my side and a lot of hardwork.

As a pastor as learnt, how does your husband feel seeing you on the pulpit, ministering to him and others?
I thank God for his life. He has been a friend since we met. Don’t forget that he came into my life at a very tender age. You know that my mother was the one who gave us the best. And he has chosen for me a father, husband, supportive of everything I do. He doesn’t feel jealous at my being at the top, he has never stopped me from moving ahead in life. He is a good man, loving and a good father to his children. He is highly supportive of my growth spiritually.

How do you handle financial issues in your home?
I must say that behind a successful man is a woman and vice versa. God created man in the Garden of Eden, then he created a woman to help meet not helpmate; that is meeting each other, complementing each other ,not leaving everything to the man. We are mature enough in handling money matters. We jointly run the home.

Are you saying in essence that you support a common purse?
Well, I must confess that we don’t have a joint account.

Why?
Not for any reason. But, every money that comes in we disburse together, though we have separate accounts. I am not against it.

How did you meet your husband?
A million dollar question. I met him at The Polytechnic Ibadan in 1974.

What features made him different from other contenders?
Laughs… No, I believe God led us to each other. I met him at 16-Young and naïve. But for a couple of years, we were friends long before we got married. We are still friends and we will remain so.

What is your take on trial marriage or better still ,live in lovers?
That is a no- go- area for me.

How will you counsel ladies on the will of God for choosing a partner?
One thing I will like to say is that for every woman is always a man. Take time, be patient, seek God, read his word to know what his will concerning your life is and pursue only His will. Trial marriage in Christendom is not biblical apart from obvious reasons, it is not of God. It opens doors for lust and immorality. When you look at it from the secular angle, it is an invitation to unwanted pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and so many things at stake. It is also to the risk of the woman living with a man and once you are tired of the relationship and you opt out. How many relationships are you going to keep on trying and trying before you get the right man. Why not stick to the one you think is right for you?

What can be done to stem the increasing wave of divorce?
Ko si eniti o mo se a fi Olorun.
It is only God who is perfect. We only need to keep asking God for wisdom for the right heart, patience, understanding and love. Marriage is for keep. Divorce is not biblical. It does not say that there will not be issues but you disagree to agree . Make amends immediately. Never let the sun go back on your wrath. Don’t keep offences/malice. It makes you age in no time. Live an open door to channel your communication. Keep communicating, keep learning from each other. No matter how good you both are , the only one who is infallible is God. Men, treat your wives gently and you will always come back home to her, because her happiness is yours. But when you treat her like a dart, what do you get?

What is your dress sense?
Nothing. My mum taught us to be simple. Let all the colours you put on match one another. I dress the way I want to be addressed. I like comfortable dresses. Your dress you know sends signals . I am not a fashion freak.

Any time for relaxation?
Yes, I recreate.

What has kept your love all these years?
God. Nothing but God.

Secret of your youthful look, no grey hair?
Peace. Grace of God.

Any exercise?
I used to, but I’ve grown lazy these days. But I’m working seriously to go back to the gym. Best meal . Amala with any good soup.

What are you into now after the banking hall experience?
I am into management consultancy. Right now we have an hostel for girls in higher institutions, ordinary and advanced levels students. We train them. It is a home away from home. I believe in touching lives of girls and women. We teach them a lot on etiquette. We organise workshops and seminars on capacity building. We also bring professionals from various fields to teach them. Don’t forget that parents these days are too busy that the children are left at the mercy of househelps. You can’t give, what you don’t have.

A peep into your background
I’m from a family of five children. I thank God for my family . Born into the Somefun family of Abeokuta. One thing, I remembered vividly is the fact that our parents always taught us to be honest, humble and to have integrity. And they always told us that we should affect the lives of people around us. My father died at age 43 when I was just nine years old. He left a lasting legacy for us. He was a man of honour, integrity and hard work. But the good thing about his departure was that he left my mother a beacon of hope to all of us. My mother was only 33 when her husband died and never remarried. I will say that apart from God, my parents are my role models.